Why estate planning matters for SF parents (and how to start)
A version of this article originally appeared in the planning library of our pals at Mitzi.
If you think estate planning is just for the uber-wealthy — or that you’ve already covered your will because you told your sister she could have your designer bag after a few glasses of wine — this article is for you.
Forget everything you think you know about estate planning. In fact, let’s ignore the word “estate” entirely. It’s outdated, misleading, and frankly, kind of snobby.
Mitzi founder and trust and estates attorney by background, Katie Katz, designed Mitzi to demystify estate planning — the idea that it’s only for the 1%, and the idea that you’ve got it covered just by having the “right” conversations. Below, she walks through what’s helpful to know about protecting yourself and the people you love.
A quick note: This is for general educational purposes only and does not constitute legal advice. Estate planning laws vary by state. Mitzi is not a law firm. Please consult a licensed attorney for guidance specific to your situation.
Let’s rebrand estate planning.
Estate planning is the process of documenting your wishes and naming trusted people to carry them out during your life and beyond — so that if you’re ever unable to speak for yourself (temporarily or permanently), the right people can step in and help.
That might mean:
Naming someone you trust to make medical decisions if you can’t (in California, this is generally done through an Advance Health Care Directive).
Choosing someone to pay your bills and manage finances if you’re hospitalized.
Writing a will so your kids, your dog, and your digital life are looked after the way you’d want.
Setting up a revocable living trust — a common choice for Bay Area families to help avoid probate and keep matters private.
Leaving a letter to your people that says, “This is who I am and what I care about.”
And here’s the thing: not planning is still a choice. It generally means the court, the state, or your relatives may end up making decisions on your behalf.
Who might want an estate plan?
Estate planning is generally worth considering for any adult — not just the wealthy or the elderly. That includes:
Parents of young children
Caregivers
Unmarried partners
Blended families
People with aging parents
If you think you’re “too young” or “don’t have enough” to plan for: if you don’t make the decisions now, the state may end up making them for you later.
What happens in California if I die without a will?
In California, when someone dies without a will, state intestacy laws generally determine who inherits, and the probate court typically decides who raises minor children. A few CA realities worth knowing:
California probate fees are set by statute as a percentage of the gross value of the estate — not the net — which can add up quickly in markets like the Bay Area, where home values are high.
Probate cases in California commonly take a year or more, and proceedings are public.
California is a community property state, which can affect how assets pass between spouses.
This is a big part of why many Bay Area families consider a revocable living trust — it’s commonly used to help keep things private and out of probate.
What happens if I’m incapacitated or unable to make decisions during my life?
If you don’t have documents in place naming a trusted person to act on your behalf, decisions about your care and finances may end up being made by a court. In California, that generally means a conservatorship proceeding — a court process that can be slow, public, and emotionally taxing. Common consequences include:
Family conflict, especially when multiple people feel suited to step in.
Delays in medical and financial decision-making, since courts typically act only after formal hearings.
Gaps in care for minor children, pets, or other dependents.
Your wishes going unknown, leaving medical professionals or courts to act without your guidance.
What documents are commonly part of a California estate plan?
Even a simple plan might include:
Will — commonly used to nominate guardians for minor children and direct how your assets are distributed.
Power of Attorney for Finances — lets someone you trust manage financial matters if you’re unable to.
Advance Health Care Directive (AHCD) — California’s standard document for naming someone to make healthcare decisions and stating your preferences for end-of-life care.
Revocable Living Trust (often paired with a pour-over will) — commonly used in California to help families avoid probate and keep matters private. Especially common for households that own real estate.
Transfer on Death (TOD) Deed — California allows real property to pass to a named beneficiary outside of probate using a recorded TOD deed. Whether it’s a fit depends on your situation.
Digital Assets Inventory — a running record of passwords, accounts, and your digital life.
Why care about any of this?
We know you’re busy building a life, not planning for the end of it. But estate planning isn’t really about death. It’s about life.
It’s about:
Keeping the people you love out of crisis.
Keeping your voice in the room, even when you can’t speak.
Making one of life’s messiest moments a little easier.
And most importantly: it’s for anyone who wants to protect what matters most — no matter how much or how little that might be.
No one taught you this — but that’s about to change.
Unless you have a lawyer in the family, a financial advisor, or you’ve been through something hard like a death or medical emergency, there’s no real reason you’d know how this works. They don’t teach estate planning in school — but they should.
And let’s be honest — talking about death, illness, or “what if” scenarios isn’t exactly dinner party material. But here’s what the team at Mitzi has found: once you open the door, people walk through it.
Everyone has a story. A question. A regret. These conversations are lively. They’re emotional. And once you give people permission to talk about the elephant in the room, the stories and concerns come pouring out.
That’s why Katie built Mitzi — because everyone deserves tools that are approachable, affordable, and actually help you take action. No legal jargon. No judgment. Just clear, accessible tools built on the experience of a trust and estates attorney.
You don’t have to do it all today — just start.
If you’ve made it this far, here’s your next small step:
✓Take Mitzi’s quiz to find out what planning documents you may actually need
✓ Forward this article to someone you love who thinks estate planning isn’t for them
✓ Join Mitzi’s waitlist—be the first to find out when Mitzi lands in California. Your future self will thank you
✓Check out the GSS Trusted Local Network: If you’re ready to get started now and want a local touch, here are a few estate planning attorneys and firms highly recommended by members of the GSS community right here in San Francisco: Cappelloni Law, LLC; Francisco D. Silva; Riordan Sykes McFadden, P.C.
Planning is one of the most caring things you can do. Mitzi helps make it easier, one small step at a time.
A reminder before you go: This article is for general educational purposes only and does not constitute legal advice. Estate planning laws vary by state. Mitzi is not a law firm. Please consult a licensed attorney for guidance specific to your situation.
